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IT'S Father's Day today and I did think to regale you with tales of the source of my sense of humour, such as it is (actually I got it from my mother) but it'll have to wait another year as more pressing headlines caught my eye.
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| THROWN OUT: Chan and his nylon holdall. |
Crash Gordon, the beleaguered PM of the UK and leader of the Labour party, and Josie yo-ho-ho, singer-actress daughter of casino king Stanley Ho. Mr Brown is secured of a good Father's Day with his wife Sarah and their two boys (they had a girl who died days after birth) because any time away from his fulminating Cabinet can only be to the good. Poor man. On top of all that is collapsing about you, to be openly branded a misogynist by one of your women MPs - Caroline Flint - that must surely cut one to the quick. Silly heifer, the flinty one, her public rage really the result of not being promoted, way NOT to go, sister, set the feminist movement a great leap backwards why don't you. Closer to home, things are not so fragrant in the Ho harbour. The girl purported to have everything, Josie-dotter-of-Stanley, had to turf out her husband in a face-saving exercise. What catches attention is the rich load from reading between the lines of that report. 'Husband Conroy Chan caught bare-chested with bikini-clad China model, wife throws him out in pre-dawn exit.' First, what mother calls her son 'Conroy'? That is a surname, madam. Then, that sad pathetic picture of Chan leaving their gated condo lugging three bags, looking for all he's worth like a broke Ah Long San. All the money in the world - well hers anyway - and his worldly possessions are bunged in a nylon canvas holdall which you usually see in refugee camps. Josie, you could not spare him coupla of your old Louis Vuitton speedys? Plus, he left Jardine's Lookout (there's caution for you!) in a taxi, at least you didn't make him take a bus. Clearly it was a case of wine, women and Song. The China model is one Song Juan from Jiangsu province. There's a scary photo, of Song and Chan (Ho could be accused of making a Song and Chan about the whole affair), she flat of face and tomboyish of figure and he with beer gut hanging loose. Only six years earlier Ho and Chan were an inseparable couple, so listen up folks, for some the seven-year itch comes a year in advance. The back story is titled Dream Home, a slasher movie Chan and Ho co-produced, starring Ho. On the set Chan and Song flirted and at the film wrap party, the two got drunk and took off their clothes and then everybody went home and nobody knew what happened next. Well next they should make a gnasher flick out of all this. How it all came out - posting tell-tale pictures on Facebook, texting third party on handphone while wife is out of sight, using phrases like 'you were great that unforgettable night' duh, and most of all, underestimating the paparazzi's nose for dirt. But at the heart of it, you know what? It's Josie Ho's galling disappointment at her husband's taste, or distinct lack of. She thought he knew better, he did marry her after all, pretty, rich, talented, educated, and then the swine makes a fool of himself with a girl who wears an animal print bikini! Unbloodyforgivable (ONE WORD). What can you say? Never work with the missus? If drunk, before removing clothes check if the girl is your wife? Or ask your father-in-law for a real job. Josie's father has shrugged off the controversy, saying, 'He's just fooling around, it's nothing.' And Stanley Ho should know. He is worth US$7 billion ($9.8 billion), has four wives and 17 children. Oh Happy Father's Day all right. BTW, Ho and Bruce Lee were cousins, their grandfathers were brothers. 
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