I KNOW I sometimes make fatherhood sound like some wonderful traipse through the Garden of Eden.

But let me also add that it can be a royal pain in the Netherlands.

Why am I so sore?

Well, I just realised that the kids have forever changed the way in which my wife and I can take holidays together.

First, they are always in the way. With those big eyes that widen even further in shock when you suggest you are leaving the house without them.

So nearly every trip, near or far, has to take the little pair into account.

Will they cope with long flights? Do we need to bring along milk bottles? Will they whine on the plane? Is there enough Milo in the bag? Can they have their favourite toys along?

And if you really think about it, their holiday interference starts long before the actual trip.

Even the destinations we can go to are predetermined by the little people.

Last year, it was Mickey Mouse and Hong Kong Disneyland. This year, it was a beach holiday in Krabi because they 'love to build sandcastles'.

And can you believe that the precious duo are already planning a 'snow-filled' vacation as the next port of call.

When did we lose control, you ask?

I think it started when they began to talk.

The requests started to come thick and fast - accompanied by the big eyes, sometimes teary for effect.

And something built into our parent-brain seems to listen to them. We somehow have this intense desire to fulfil those wishes.

Are we victims of some Jedi mind trick?

I mean, how great it would have been to have gone to Bangkok this time around, for some great shopping, food, golf and relaxing massages.

But no. The kids wouldn't have it.

No, they needed a beach. And a big swimming pool, filled with plastic marine creatures to ride on.

And so we went to Krabi and came back burnt. Couldn't wipe the smiles off the kids' faces. Until the trip home, of course.

But soon, they got into a little huddle. I know they are already plotting the next attack. I can see it in the little faces.

But I have some tricks up my own sleeves.

I took aside the wife after the kids were asleep. How about we sneak away for a few days? Just the two of us.

Her eyes lit up at the possibility. Can we? How? Where? But what about...?

Grandma

No what-abouts, I said. Let's make it happen. Bangkok. Grandma can keep an eye on them, and three nights is no biggie.

We checked out the flights and the hotels. It seemed doable. We clinked a glass of wine in celebration.

But before we could break the news, fate kicked some leftover Krabi beach sand into our eyes.

As it turned out, grandma had her own plans. She was off to India to visit the family.

We understood, of course. She needed a break.

She'll be back before school starts for the kids and my teacher-wife.

And that essentially means we'll have to wait for the next school break. March may be too tight for the wife and June is bad for me.

So, we may be looking at December again.

And December, of course, is 'hunting season' for the kids.

Sigh.

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